email to the boss...

I just emailed the following to my boss:
Subject: I respectfully ask for a moment of your time, sir.

Message:

The right good and honorable Big Chris, with all due respectfullness and becoming that suits the graduate student addressing his right honorable advisor, Danio Wagner, respectfully wishes to point out that temperature in "his" half of the laboratory fluctuates between 25.4 C and 26.1 C (77.7 to 79 degrees Fahrenheit) depending on the time of afternoon of data collection.

Whereas common laboratory protocol, as is rightful and befitting for this laboratory to follow, commonly hold the term "room temperature" to be between 21 and 23 C,

And whereas numerous people make bothersome comments about the room "being fucking hot,"

And whereas Christopher might sometimes agree with said colloquial references and classification of the situation, if not the profane and disrespectful manner of such vocalization,

And whereas the right honorable Big Chris wishes for embryos that are being placed our in "his" half of the lab receive the bona fide "room temperature" incubation that their owners implicitly seek,

And whereas the current temperature regulation prohibits all from accomplishing these goals,

And whereas the honorable Big Chris wishes to respect the sensitivities and desires of his right honorable advisor, Danio Wagner, who initially set and evaluated the thermoregulation of said room, and who may have set the temperature to agree with his humours and sensitivities,

Big Chris HEREBY respectfully petitions the powers that be that a precise recalibration and reestablishment be made to the thermoregulatory instruments as they exist and control thermal conditions in "his half" of the lab to best serve the needs and comforts of all users of said room if those adjustments will not upset the sensitivities of the right honorable Danio Wagner.

Please advise.
;)

Comments

Anonymous said…
Something tells me the response was something along the lines of, "The fifteen minutes you used to create that would've been better partitioned as one minute to type out and send the email and fourteen minutes doing work."

;)
3:36 PM
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